Ninety miles outside Chicago, can’t stop driving I don’t know why, so many questions need an answer, two years later, you’re still on my mind .. whatever happened to Amelia Earhart? Who holds the stars up in the sky? Is true love once in a lifetime? Did the captain of Titanic cry? Someday we’ll know if love can move a mountain, someday we’ll know why the sky is blue, someday we’ll know why I wasn’t meant for you ..

Wow another day at school gone by so quickly. In the morning I slept till around 9.00am and then got up and ate breakfast. Mmmm, congee. Yup then I got ready and stuff and soon dad came home and picked me up to go to Doctor Prowse Surgery. When we got there early, we realized there were still so many people ahead of me so I went and got my books out from the car and started reading through some geography notes. When it was my turn, Dr sprayed this gross tasting thing in my mouth which made it all number then he kinda stuck a mirror in my mouth to look at my throat. He said it was still red and yeh to “drink more fluids.” Seriously, that’s all he says lol.

I got to school and first thing I see sitting in our area was Mel and Alissa with these 2 guys. I can’t believe Alissa is moving so soon! That’s so sad L I’m gonna miss her. I don’t know why some people hate her so much. She’s so sweet and cute. Then Mrs Davidson kept coming up and telling me to take off my yellow singlet inside or either tuck it in my pants. Now that is so not an option, who the heck tucks shirts in their pants when it’s not a business/blouse thing. The recess bell rung and I signed in at the front office. Then it was Science time and all we did was play bingo trying to learn some of the elements off the Periodic Table. Commerce was so lame. She was like yelling at us “IM SICK OF THIS, I’VE HAD TO PUT UP WITH THIS FOR 2 YEARS, IM NOT GOING TO ANYMORE, YOU’RE LACK OF CO-OPERATION …” bla bla we don’t get to go into town anymore because some of us don’t want to but today we said we wouldn’t mind and she’s like no bla bla. Then she made us go around classes to ask for advertising space off students parents and at first she gave me the year 12 list and I was like WHAT?! No way, how embarrassing so I whinged and whined for a while lol she told me off so much and then she gave me the Year 8 list. At lunch time Mrs Lawn came up to me and begged me to host a Japanese girl because no one else could and because I’m so nice, I said yes and omg I can’t belive I said yes. I’m gonna bored the crap outta her >< Ohwells it’s mostly during school anyways but still! We’ll see what happens. This means that I definitely can’t to go Thanh’s birthday party. So many birthdays I always miss out on.

After school Scotty came to my house and we had a good chat and Georgia and Emma were here for a while waiting for their school bus. Then it started pouring so Scotty got his bike and quickly rode home lol. He took my playboy hat with him.

Now back to school work I just got told today we have a History test next Thursday, then there is a Geography Assessment on the 11^th September, then History Assessment is due on the 12^th September. Along with that comes my Japanese Assignment and English Biography on my mum (which I haven’t started). So much homework!

Love, Katrina

damn baby all i need is a lil bit, a lil bit of this, a lil bit of that

Hmmm so full atm. School today wasn't too bad. I slept really late, hmm around 2 something last night so I was really tired. Well I got up, well parents woke me up and had breakfast and got ready to go to school. First period was maths, Mr Mason is away at Year 9 camp all week so we get this stage 5.3 revision booklet. Some of the stuff is really hard, suprisingly. Then it was Science, I haven't written up my experiment yet >< so much work to do, and she's making us do bingo cards like okay then miss? We're in Year 10 and you're telling us to do bingo cards. Kristi had her Science Project today, so proud of her lol. Everyone was suprised she actually got it done. Tara was at school today till Recess, she's lost so much weight! But I'm glad she's feeling better for now. Hmm then it was History, bleh prime ministers crap and got an assessment due in 2 weeks which I only got today! So gay, then it was English. I ended up writing 3 pages but I realised something at lunch. I put the plot of the movie in the 2nd last paragraph, not a smart idea aye. Ohwells it's over for now. THen we had double period of Food Tech Theory because Katie and I have been away for so long, we didn't hand in our recipe in time. Man we still dunno what dessert to make and I have to practice making this heart strawberry thing and yeh don't think I even have a baking tray at home. lol sad. Well I tried some of Maddie's & Bron's wonton dessert, it was so yum then I tried some of Kyle's brownies, he gave me this huge piece! So full after all I've eaten today.

It's time to get on with work soon. I'm stressing because of how much work there is coming up. I'm also stressing at financial difficulties, damn Target why can't they ring me again and give me a job lol. So many birthdays coming up and I'm low on cash because I bought 2 shirts yesterday! Ohwell, retail therapy is good once in a while. I'm gonna use work to occupy my mind from now on. I'm not going to think of other things, no point. SO EFFING GAY ANYWAYS. When it hurts, it's really only your mind telling you it hurts, so I guess I can control that. :)

Love, Katrina

Hmm, should I be saying yay? School tomorrow, how exciting. I think I have to do my third part of the English Assessment tomorrow. I won't remember it all will I? I never do, I take ages to prepare my long response things. Ohwells.

My weekend was mighty boring. All Saturday was catching up on work, then headed off to Sydney at night time. Then got to Sydney and slept and then woke up this morning and got ready. We went to pick up my older cousin Jayme and then went to Chinatown. I haven't been there in so long. We bought pineapple buns for my grandma and some food for ourselves. Then we drove to the hospital. It was so funny yet embarassing. Granny, she speaks chinese all the time and she talks so loud when there's like 3 other Australian ladies in the same room. We're always telling her to talk quieter. And she talks to the Australian ladies in half chinese with a bit of English, like they're gonna understand? Like when she says she doesnt eat eggs, she says ' mm sec eggs ' LOL. She makes me laugh, but I love her. She's a strong lady =), always wanting to walk because she had an operation on her knee and yeh she really wants to walk so she's always off to practice walking.

Mummy and Daddy arrived at the hospital and then later we headed back to Campsie. I went to my dentist appointment and then I went and bought a shirt. First time I've been shopping in so long. Yup then headed home.

So glad Lisa's sweet 16th turned out all planned and everything went well. Memorable night of vomitting xD, but glad everyone had fun.

staying in the shadows, helping you when i can, hoping you are happy ..

Love, Katrina

As it goes by the story that’s already told, comes a time when we all must let go, what happened to the story, discontented cuts inside, it’s not meant to be this lonely, we were never meant to fail

Another week has passed. Time has been flying recently. Well yesterday I thought I lost my mp3 and was like close to having a panic attack but before I slept I saw the black cord hanging next to my bed and YES I found it.  I was so happy. I was thinking to myself when I couldn’t find it: “Oh no, saving of $200 is needed.”

Today is my dearest baby Lisa’s birthday party. And I’m here sitting at home whilst they’re all out there having fun. I really wanted to go but I guess life can’t always go your way and the saying: “the things you want more are the things you can’t have.” I hope you’re enjoying yourself out there darl and I hope nothing goes wrong.

I slept really well last night actually. Yeh I took those drowsiness pills but they didn’t kick in till 11 something and then I slept, only waking up once till all the way this morning. I woke up when my parents did then I woke up at 9.30 when my alarm went off. I got ready and got my books then dad came home and got me. He needed me to look after the shop whilst he did his cooking classes because mum went to work at 11.30. Yup and when I say books, I remind myself more of how much work there is for me to do. I just finished writing up my English film review that I have to do in class on Monday probably, but I’m stuck on a few things. I don’t understand what to write about “sets” if it’s based on a new release in the cinemas.

I’m going to Sydney tonight and yeh visiting my poor grandma tomorrow L. Damn I feel sorry for her. I miss her.

Love, Katrina

i'll be your dream, i'll be your wish, i'll be your fantasy, i'll be your hope, i'll be your love, i'll be everything that you need, i'll love you more with every breath .. a reason for living, a deeper meaning, i wanna stand with you on a mountain ..

Yes the old Katrina is back with her eating habits. I finally have my apetite today and as expected, I PIGGED OUT SO MUCH. I'm not even gonan write what I ate because it was so much. Well school today was fantastic, except I haven't stopped complaining one bit about how much work I've missed out on. I have a Geography Assessment Task in 2 weeks and I hate Geography. It's such confusing stuff about Australi and it's global links and crap. Then History is all about the United Nations and prime ministers, so gay. I didn't do the 3rd part of the English Assessment today which means more work for me. My Science Assignment was due today and no I didn't have it. More work for me. Maths I'm so behind, stupid dividing polynomials and I don't get it. I thought year 6 was the last time I'd ever do long division. Japanese Assignment due in a couple of weeks, fucking so hard. Commerce omg Rudd and I had to walk into town and back, i was DEAD. I was so tired but yeah. I saw Tara before I left, damn she's so skinny and sick looking. I miss her so much and she's changing schools next year, leaivng me in that shit hole =( *sigh.

After school Sammy came over and yeh bla bla then we headed to the Gym to do Body Jam and I only did 30 mins of the class because I got so tired. Then we went to Port Panthers and had dinner there. Now I'm at home and yes another pointless entry but it gets it out of my mind.

Love, Katrina

i dont wanna see you cry, but i don't wanna be the one to tell you a lie so how do you let it go when you you just dunno what's wrong ..

In the past few days I've felt really alone. That sounds so werid but yeh I really really realised how much my parents mean to me. I always use to put friends before anything, \cared so much about friends, I mean I still do but I realised ever since I've been sick, what have friends done? Nothing. I mean the only people that really care will really only be your family when you're in hard times. I watched my parents stress, worry, care for me in the past 2 weeks. I realised how much they mean to me so much, I'd die without them. Also I've been watching these video tapes and this girl she lost her mum, her brother and her dad was really sick and her husband left her whilst she was still pregnant. I felt the loneliness she felt, how weird and also in that movie, they put their dad in hospital and it just makes you think how lonely it is for him to be there. I felt that becuase I was in hospital and I felt lonely there. I can't imagine turning old with no one caring for me, being stuck in those nursing homes. What do those people do everyday. *sigh

Now whoever read that, DOESNT MEAN I DONT LOVE MY FRIENDS, YOUS KNOW I LOVE ALL OF YOU VERY MUCH.

I finally slept last night because the doctor told us to buy these drowsiness pills. It was good, took a while though. I slept at 10 till 7 i think but there were a few times where i woke up but i went straight back to sleep. I stayed in bed till 11 though, rested a bit and now I'm still tired, how gay. Should I go to school tomorrow? My throat is much better today but my head hurts atm. WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE PROBLEMS. Everyday there has been a problem, so annoying! I hate being sick! IM OVER IT.

Awww my Cupcake's bday this weekend and IM NOT GOING TO BE THERE. I hope you all have fun, especially you Lisa, better not turn out like my bday =) I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU HEAPS xoxox

Love, Katrina

what did i do to deserve this, i didn't even get one last kiss from you, oh baby God took your love from me, he needed an angel so it seems, i need to feel your hands all over me, i need to feel you kissing me, i need to feel you holding me, i need to feel your touch and i miss your love so much ..

Yes Katrina has returned to her blogging ways! Well the past week and a bit I've been very sick and I still am but I finally have the energy to blog. Well here's the story:

Last Sunday, not the last one but the one before that I was in Cabramatta. Suddenly I got a bad stomach ache and my whole body ached and my mission to walk to the library failed. I stopped at the restuarant my dad was eating in and sat there for a while then I bursted into tears because it hurt so much. He took me back to the car and I was really cold and tired. I slept for a wihle and then woke up and felt very sick from then on. My legs and back were aching like hell and that 5 hour trip in the car was the worst. That night I kept waking up with high temperatures and body aches and my throat began to become really sore. It was like that for the next few days except my throat got worse. I couldn't swallow not even my own saliva. Eating was too painful and I was always tired, couldn't even get out of bed.

Saturday morning I went to the doctors and he said it was just a normal cold and flu sore throat but I couldn't stand the pain anymore. Dad took me to the emergency at the hospital and we waited for a while. Then the doctor said the epiligiptis or something in my throat was swollen. He said he'd give me 3 tablets and I would get better but when he came back he said he had 2nd thoughts and that it could be realy bad because if it was heaps swollen it could block out my breathing system and then I'd die. So he referred use to a specialist straight away and we went there. He stuck this thing in my nose to look at my throat, gee that felt so queer. He said it wasn't too bad so we went back to the hospital and I had to get a blood test and antibiotics in me. Then I was there for the next 2 days. It was the worst time in my life, even though I don't feel much better at home but it was just so BORING there and plus I can't sleep anymore. It was even worse I couldn't sleep i was just laying there doing nothing. Now I'm home, I still can't sleep. I'm so worried if it's always going to be like this. I slept maximum of 2 hours last night. I'm really worried actually but I dunno what to do. Dad even gave me a sleeping tablet last night and it didn't even work. *sigh. I'm just gonna make myself really tired today if I can.

My throat doesn't hurt that much anymore but sometimes it still does but hopefully it'll stop hurting soon. But I'm always feeling sick in the tummy, like I wanna vomit and stuff. I hate this feeling. I wanna sleep properly again! ><

Love, Katrina

so turn around, don't wanna let you see me cry, don't know how we ever gonna say goodbye, never thought i'd feel this way, wish i knew the words to say, so turn around, i didn't know you're still inside ..

Yes, I'm blogging once again. Now that I wanna blog, I don't know what to blog about. I've been sick yesterday and the day before. Haven't been so sick in so long. But I"m getting better now, daddy's making me take heaps of medication. I'm gonna go school today, staying at home is too boring because I just lay in bed but then I can't sleep so yehs.

I went and visited Tara last night, lol she didn't even seem that sick but because she has Glandular Fever, which is swollen glands, she has to rest otherwise it takes longer than 6 weeks to get better. I dunno how she survives at home, so boring not that school is much better but yehs.

Damn there's so much work I have to do, but I just feel so tired and weak but there's SO MUCH. Oohh, I gotta haircut =) I love it when i first get haircuts, because i love the length =).

Anyways, yes I know boring blog entry but I'm too tired so I'm gonna go now.

Love, Katrina

it's funny when you find yourself looking from the outisde, i'm standing here but all I want is to be over there, why did i let myself believe miracles could happen cus now i have to pretend that i don't really care ..

I finally got to watch "High School Musical" last night. It's alright but so damn corny! Especially the beginning, how can everything just happen through ONE song seriously ==', pretty gay ending too but bits of it were cute =) and funny when that music lady clapped lol. Sammy and I couldn't stop laughing.

Love Katrina

oh baby you're the only thing that i really need, baby that's why you make me wanna call you in the middle of the night, you make me hold you till the morning light, you make me wanna love, you make me wanna fall, you make me wanna surrender my soul. i know this is a feeling that i just can't fight, you're the first and last thing on my mind .. =)

I'm back blogging again. I've been inspired, I wanna grow up to help people who have disabilities. I don't want that as my future career but I want to do voluntary social work for the community to just help people that are disadvantaged compared to us. I was at the gym today after I went to the school interview and there were a few men, they were so cute. Like they're doing weights and they count how many reps they've done out loud and they're always smiling. But it makes me think, do they really know what they're doing behind that smile and laugh they have, so cute but sad. I was smiling at this man so much, he was so happy yet helpless.

Mmm, then I went to our shop and got money to go to Coles. Got told off by dad about what I was wearing ==', omgoodness wasn't even anything revealing. I saw Kristi at Coles. I bought my mushroom and hair products then headed home. Ate some strawberries and now I'm here. I'm excited for the holidays!

BestFriends                                                                                                                                                        You're the one who's by my side
when no one else is there.
You're the one I can always count on,
You always seem to care.

You help me through
the tough times,
and when I've lost all hope,
You cry with me at sad times,
and laugh at all my jokes.

You never seem to judge me
or ever put me down,
You put a smile on my face,
When ever you see a frown.

You're better than a brother,
You're more than just my boyfriend,
You have a special place in my heart,
That's why your my Best Friend.

Love, Katrina